Seth & Lizzy Graves

If I were famous, the first thing I would do would be to change my name. Some famous people do it--artists, writers, musicians--but I think everyone should do it. Here are some examples of what I would change my name to if I were a particular famous person:

Thomas Wisconsin
Cozy Byron, Cory Hydrant, or Cody Giant
Jordan Frown
Jordan C Wrinkly
Garage Bahamas
George W Shrub
Gotham Chopra
Bow Bling

Speaking of Bow Bling, Cody Giant, and other tall people that play basketball--Why do they think they are so cool when they dunk it? I just kind of feel like saying, "Big deal. You are tall, you can dunk it. If I were that tall and got paid millions to dunk a lot, I probably would practice my dunk shots so much I'd never miss." Respectfully, there are some awesome plays that end in dunk shots, but if you happen to come upon the ball when you are right under the basket (Crack Fo'Meal, Ciao Bling, and others) it is not that cool to dunk it. It is pretty much just an easy way out. If Pablo Snoozer were a few feet taller he could be that guy for the Jazz, but instead he just yells a lot. But then again, who actually wants to be so tall they don't have to jump to dunk it? There is that guy in Asia (Ripley cannot believe how tall he is, and Guiness says he is the tallest) who refuses to be measured because he knows how uncool it is to be so tall.